Sometimes you just want to have fun, and most often these days slasher movies don’t deliver the trashy B-grade schlock you’re thirsting for; with the obvious exception of Troma entertainment. In a perfect world Lloyd Kaufman would team up with Hooters and create the greatest Friday night flick ever made; until that day we have Girls Gone Dead to chow down pizza and chug beer to.
Girls Gone Dead is unashamedly made for guys, so I’ll refer to it as DoubleGD simply because it sounds like the greatest bra size ever and that is exactly the kind of mind set you need to enjoy this movie. There are more tits than a dairy farm and enough cheese to justify the metaphor. The kills are hilariously over the top with that ridiculous bright-red thick-fake blood we all know and love. The girls are…well they’re female, so there isn’t much more to say other than there is a type for every taste, and they all get topless so there is no accounting for mine.
DoubleGD follows the first spring break of six ex-high school cheerleaders as they go off to party at one of their dad’s beach houses. Rebecca, played by unknown Katie Peterson, is the virgin and protagonist of the group with a very religious mother. Religion is exploited throughout as a plot device with a fair amount of negative focus given to nutty Christian zealots. The movie features a McGuffin in the form of Crazy Girls Unlimited “the most disgusting company in the country” as described by a snake oil TV evangelist.
They film girls partying topless in true internet style and it isn’t long before our spring break hotties meet a group of horny guys making their own Crazy Girls rip off boob-video. As the bras pop the heads begin to roll courtesy of a religiously sacrificial axe in the hands of a cloaked maniac. Who is the crazed killer? It’s hardly Giallo but there is an interesting amount of red herrings to make the flick interesting.
Production value looks way above average for this type of movie. The colours are bright and glossy with very little of the dreaded soap opera look we usually have to suffer. The acting is sufficiently crap, which translates as the perfect performance for schlock. We are also treated to a cameo by internet sensation and B-movie film critic Shawn C. Phillips aka Coolduder and without the inclusion of Shawn I doubt I would’ve watched this flick and I imagine it’s the same for many others. Another notable cameo is scream queen Linnea Quigley from Return of the Living Dead, Night of the Demons and the Christmas slasher classic Silent Night Deadly Night. However, I think the director could have done a lot more with Linnea but the fact she was included at all is a great nod to the fans.
Linnea Quigley Scream Queen
DoubleGD achieves exactly what it sets to be. The relatively newbie director, Michael Hoffman Jr takes you on a campy, colourful, sexy and bloody ride. It is one hell of a party flick and goes down a treat with an ample amount of junk food and beer. If you love watching Slumber Party massacre, Cheerleader Massacre, Sorority House massacre or anything with blood and boobs you’ll lose your head for Girls Gone Dead.
altarofthecult.wordpress.com 